What is connection?
In Sanskrit, the term Maya means “illusion.” Usually it refers to a dreamlike state, that we perceive to be reality (our “everyday” existence)
This dreamlike state is driven by the subconscious mind. It is created from our day to day activities, belief systems, societal conditioning, thoughts.. Inputs to the mind. Similar to a pond with ripples in it, the distorted reflection we see is the illusion. The still reflection is the reality.
One of the big reasons for the longer retreats we run is to eliminate many of the inputs. This goes a long way in getting closer to reality quickly.
Connection, to me, is our relating to things when we see past maya. I don’t really believe in having a weak “connection” with something or someone. To me, it’s binary. Either we connect, or we don’t.
There are some distinct differences in connection with different people, depending on behaviour. Here are some thoughts on some basic principles to look at to uphold Connection with people. Like any skill, we can simply train these over a period of time. We definitely can practice connection.
- Don’t bring out your phone. If you must, step outside for a bit to tend to a call. You can use your phone out around people, but not if you also want to connect powerfully with them too at the same time. It doesn’t matter if the phone is off – it has too strong of a subconscious meaning to us as a society now.
- Tech free bedroom. It pays to be very careful what energy you bring into the bedroom. To me, the bedroom is for two things only, all of which are very dear to me: Sleep and sex. Bringing a phone into the bedroom is asking for a disrupted sleep (again, subconscious connection plus EMF), and leaving Connection on the table.
- Listening meditation. Listening is a practice, maybe even an art now. When you listen as closely as you possibly can, it can become a meditation. You don’t need to be weird about it, but really, really pay attention to what is being said.
- Meet in the eyes. Clear eye contact is massive. This is a big reason why I’m not a fan of Skype, facetime or other video calls. More on this another time.
- Physical touch. Today, we are starved for a touch as a society. This doesn’t mean in a game, a sport, a massage session or otherwise where it is incidental or a by-product. This is just during normal relating.
There are many more, but a practice of these 5 will definitely bring human connection to a new level. When you look at all of them, really we are just becoming present to the moment with another human.
We are eliminating ripples.
We are seeing a more true reality. We are rebuilding connection.
