Steps for Habit Shifts

Ultimately, I believe in practices that help to increase awareness: meditation, various sensory shifts, silent practices or retreats. 

Through these, we can (with practice), decrease the gap between our conscious mind and subconscious. Become more aware of the patterns that are running in the background as well as heighten our experience of reality.

However, on the other side of the coin is optimising the patterns that do (and must) run in the background. The automation. The habits.

When we understand that the seeds of habits are formed in many cases when we are very young (often before 7 years old), then it makes sense that the system we can use to change or modify habits also seems pretty basic.

Much of this is from the book “The Power of Habit,” in which Duhigg outlines not only the power of habit, but how to change them. I’ve simply expanded on the reward system to suit what I have found works for me.

The process may look different for each person. 

I’ve changed many habits: around social media, phone usage, night-time routines, car cleaning/maintenance, training (my habit was to do too much..). All little things, but massive when you average it out over a year or life-time.

More significantly, the habits that I wanted to change (e.g. too much time on social media), were “over-written” by habits that I felt would serve me more (e.g writing this daily blog).

Here are the steps:

– Figure out the cue: if a new habit, what time of day, group of people, location etc you want to associate with the habit. With old habits – what is the cue that was triggering you

– Lay out the process: What is it you want to do, or what were you doing that you want to change. What is the new pattern to replace it?

– Set up the reward system: I use an increasing value with decreasing frequency reward system. For example end of day one = small reward. Then end of week one = bigger reward. Then end of week two = bigger again. After four weeks, I then go to monthly rewards. This reward thing will sound silly, but it’s important. Remember, you are training the slow, not-very-advanced reptilian part of the brain. 

For me, cues have included: Days of the week, time of day etc. 

Practices have included when to use social media, when to wash the car, when to write etc.

Rewards have included books, massages, crystals (I like crystals…), gold class movies etc. Small things – but things I wouldn’t normally have bought perhaps. Then longer term brings recognition and bigger rewards.

Notes:

• It’s important to not stop. You need to keep going with the reward system for at least 12 weeks in my opinion
• You may always be susceptible to your old habits. These can run very deep in the subconscious mind. For these, you need to overlay the new, replacement habit.
• Stress can weaken your ability to stick to the new habit. Therefore using a method to down-regulate the nervous system in times of stress may be important, via food/meditation/breath work
• An accountability system may be helpful alongside the reward system.
• Lay on another habit shift with a seperate set of rewards about 4 weeks after the first.  
• look objectively to find habits that aren’t currently serving you. Or, if you get stuck, do a peer review (if you’re married or have a partner I’m sure they’ll happily tell you some)